The Uggliest of Truths

The Uggliest of Truths

Or…Dear God, what are those monstrosities on your feet?

Pardon me, dear friend,

If you are one of those who honestly believes

That when you sashay past,

The entire world freezes in awe,

Of the sleekness and elegance of your attire,

The poised perfection of your beauty.

Pardon me, I implore you, if I offend,

For I feel the unrelenting need to be utterly and unabashedly honest

For it evokes the deepest sadness in me

To see one such as you,

Trapped in your own little mind.

You are caught in a world of price tags,

Coach purses, the latest trends, and the hottest parties.

One of the Fabulously fake fashionistas

Too immersed in their own conceit to see the reality of the world around them.

Really, it’s sad.

Actually… no. Hold on.

I take that back.

I rescind my previous statement,

For I do not beg pardon from someone like you.

My blood comes to an instant boil

Upon sight of you

And your horridly ugly boots,

Grungy sweatpants haphazardly

Scrunched

Bunched

And crumpled

Within.

Do me and the rest of the world a favor.

For now that the ugly truth has been placed before your eyes,

You have two choices.

One, you can continue to walk by,

Falsely believing that you are the very best the world has to offer,

Or, you can use this moment to embrace your entrance into the height of unfashion,

And have the strength to make a change.

I know,

The truth hurts,

And can sometimes be ugly.

But trust me,

It’s not as ugly as those boots.

original:1.2010

latest: 2.2011